Delegate, Delegate, Delegate

Make September Delegation Month!

September is a time when most families begin lots of new activities and need to establish new schedules. The more organized your family is, the clearer the boundaries and the guidelines for expectations, the more smoothly family life will run.

During the summer, life is typically simpler, and the family rules tend to go out the window.

Start your fall with a family meeting to discuss daily schedules and rules. Come to the meeting with a clear picture of what you want, need and expect from each family member.

Life can get so busy that moms go crazy trying to keep up with everything. The first thing to go is usually mom’s free time. By putting everyone else’s needs first, you are actually teaching everyone how to treat you!

Expect lots of help from your family and you will get it, providing there are clear consequences if chores are not done. Set a daily and weekly schedule for each member. For instance, children from the age of 3 can be expected to help with simple chores such as setting the dinner table, and putting their toys away. Children from 4 years old should make their own beds, help with folding laundry, put their own dirty and clean laundry away, empty waste baskets, water plants, unload the dishwasher, clear the table after dinner, feed the animals, etc., etc.

If your child needs a ride to practice, they need to know that their chores need to be done before you leave the house to take them. Make charts so they know ahead of time what is expected of them and when!

As Dr. Phil says, every child has a currency that you can use to get them to do what you expect them to do. For some it is allowance, or the ability to play video games or to watch a favorite show. If they don’t’ do what is expected, you take away the privilege that is important to that child. No yelling, no pleading, just consequences for their actions.

Delegating chores to your family is teaching them life skills, making them feel important in the family, and freeing your time to spend more quality time with them, as well as eliminating the stress of the martyr syndrome that you feel when you think you need to do it all. If you let them, your family  will let you do it all, but if you delegate firmly they will all pitch in to help!

Part of the success to delegating is in making sure expectations are very clear as to when the chore is to be done,  the quality of work that is expected, and in providing enough instruction on how to do the job correctly, and proper tools to enable them to get the job done. For instance, putting the pet food in easily accessible containers that a child can open, having a stool handy so a child can put dishes or laundry away.

Be sure to give rewards for weeks when jobs are well done!!